Cinderella ate my daughter

Argument, Reflection, and Point of view

I don't want to be that obvious, but I am a black women (girl...whatever). I washed all the Disney princesses movies when I was growing up. Because I was the only one girl in my family with three boys, my parents wanted me to be comfortable playing with the guys, but in the same time they did not want me to forget that I was a girl and from time to time I was suppose to be girly. My parents figured out really early that I was not a girly girl (NO PINK, NO PUFFY PRINCESSY DRESSES...NONE OF THAT) and I am pretty sure my mom was a little disappointing by that. I am not going to lye, I loved washing Cinderella, sleeping beauty, snow white, and all those wonderful  "fantasist" movies, but in the same time it did not help me. Me, as a black little girl, I grow up feeling left out; my skin was not light enough, my hair was not good enough pretty enough to be in a beautiful princess head. Even though I grow up liking those beautiful fantasy girl/women, I did not relate to any of them and for a little girl, it is confusing. 
I do not blame my parents for that, there were not really much choice at the time. I am glad that I am the person that I am today and I feel really confident to say that I will prefer not showing those "Disney princesses movies" to my future children. I believe those movies have a negative point of views, women have to wait on "prince charming" to save them or the day, a certain type of women are considerate beautiful/ princesses (size zero, if that is possible), for women to be happy they always have to find that particular prince charming. also what a pressure to pit on a man. 

I was chocked and curious 

      

"Do not let your self-worth be defined by bullies...the cruel words of one are nothing compare to the shout of many"  Jennifer Linvingston

What Are Little Boys Made of?

                             

  "When they say boys will be boys, they mean boys will be uncivilized animals."  Kimmel

Argument

"Gurian adroitly point out the nearly unbearably pressure on young boys to conform, to resort to violence to solve problems, to disrupt classroom decorum. But he thinks it's entirely due to biology-not peer culture, media violence, or parental influence. And Biddulph agrees: 'Testosterone equals vitality,' he writes  All we have to do is 'honor it and steer it into healthy direction." (157)

By reading this i realized that both, Gurian and Biddulph, are contradicting each other. They are both saying that the environment is not in any case responsible for the boys/men violence behaviors, but biology (testosterone) is. While continuing reading the article, they said, "All we have to do is 'honor it and steer it into healthy direction." I laugh because when you steer something/someone into a healthy direction, it means that you are influencing/modeling it/him/her into something/someone else. It also mean that the environment has an important influence on it/him/her change and/or behavior. Of cause testosterone has a big influence on boys, but that is not the only aspect that pushes them to violence. Which bring us to the feminism, they wants to change the traditional "boys mentality;" (boys don't cry, boys must be strong, boys fight...). Here is a quote

"Feminism encourages men-and their sons-to be more emotionally open and expressive, to develop emphatic skills, and to channel emotional outbursts away from violence." (159)

By disregarding Gurian and Biddulph theory of only testosterone equal violence in boys, The author said that by being openly emotional and understand their pain, boys will learn to be less violent and compassionate toward themselves and others. 

                                   

       Why is the first image is more acceptable than the second picture??? 

ANOTHER ONE GONE SO YOUNG 

STOP THE BULLYING

AND 

CARE FOR A SECOND

JOHNS/FRYE

Oppression by Frye

In her article Frye said "oppressing is oppression to those who oppress as well as to the oppress." The society were I grow up is a more dominate by masculinity than femininity. Men are to be strong, providers, protectors, the head of the household etc. Mostly do not act womanly; no crying, no girly attitude, brief men are not to be feminine. That is how I grow up, I believe that it is in oppression against themselves too. Can you imagine how hard it is to stop yourself from crying because something is hurting you. It is more hurtful that cry and forget about it. They oppress themselves physically and emotionally to get to that point.
And for women, she compare a men and a women sexual behavior in this society; if a man has multiple sexual partner, it is a good thing. But if a women behave the same way as a men, she is label as a prostitute (to use a proper name). It is a double standard and an oppression against women.   


Just see how men always cry alone or if it is in from of people, they have to say "I AM SORRY." It is not a crime!!!

  

EVENT #2: RACE AGAINST RACISM

I am so happy that I volunteer on Oct 7,2012 RACE AGAINST RACISM. I was an honor and a pleasure to assist at such an event. The race started at nine am at Woonsocket World War II memorial Park, but I had to get there at eight am to meet with Jamel Lee (the intern from Rhode Island College). I contacted Jamel because he is working for the Lady who organised the race this year. When I got there, they were a lot of people registering already to race. 
(At the right Jamel in a blue hat and underneath the starting spot of the race.)  
                                                                                                                                                             
I was please to see so many people; not only black, but many whites, some Asian, Spanish, old, young, kids, one baby in his stroller while the father was pushing it and so much more.       This event represent so much for many people, RACISM still exist and it is a feminist issue. As I study in the Women study class, it is a fight for tolerance, acceptation, and equality for all. This race is the definition of freedom and recognition that some people care and are tired of it too. As the suffragist did so long ago, this race is another way for protesting against RACISM and what it stand for.               
In that race I saw CEO and vise president of companies running nest to high school kids and people sheering along the way. It was also breaking the barrier of Social status; no rich, no poor...just people running for a common goals: "STOPPING THIS INJUSTICE AGAINST RACES." It is not fair to stay quiet when against any injustice. 
                                        (My spot: to help runner) 

                  (Second runner passing me by)

                 (the first group coming)

                 (another group)

                   (rids and friends)

 (the mom, dad, and the baby in the stroller. The lady and her two boys where there to cheer the runner. The love in the house               
                          in that corner)

 (those 2 groups were the loudest one: they were having so much fun)

                (the finish and refreshing spot)

                (security first of cause !!!!)


                                      

Anzaldua,"La conciencia de la mestiza: Toward a new conciseness."

Reflection
I am definitely not an "mestiza*" as the author Gloria Anzaldua descried herself, but by reading this text "La conciencia de la mestiza: Toward a new conciseness." She said, "the new mestiza copes by developing a tolerance for contradiction, tolerance for ambiguity. she learns to be an Indian in Mexican culture, to be Mexican from Anglo point of view. She learns to juggles culture. she has a plural personality, she operates in a pluralistic mode-nothing is trust out, the good the bad and the ugly, nothing rejected, nothing abandoned. Not only does she sustain contradiction, she turns the ambivalence into something else.."

What I understood with this quote is, for every person living in this world (as we learn in class) fitting in is the most important thing. So to fit in we (as people) have to learn the "Norms" of the society we are in. Which bring me back to social class. To be accepted and welcome in any groups, culture, race,... we need to know the "book code." The book is a pass to all the doors in front of us. For the Mestiza, because of their past history, they have to make more effort, swallow their pain & pride to just fit in. They can not accept one culture and reject the other just because it will be easier and accepted for the "privileged" people, but they have to juggle both or multiple culture. At the end, I feel like, they become chameleon and most of the time lost without any knowledge of who you really are.

I am so tired of seeing people who are "different" making so much effort to just fit in; the LGBTQ community have to "come out" as if the straights even come out of something; the "culturally poor" have to work harder to be in the same circle as the "culturally rich," women has to constantly fight for their right ... YOU KNOW WHAT? BEING DIFFERENT IS A WONDERFUL PRIVILEGED...AT LEAST I DO NOT PUT MYSELF IN A SMALL BOX.
Even though, I will not accept John Frye idea of "Privileged" people as better than anybody else, I believe that those who only look up their nose at those who have less than them made the effort of braking that social class boxes, Mestiza and others will be much better.
If that never happened, I will patiently way for the idea of Gloria Anzaldua; "the future will belong to the mestiza. Because the future depends on the breaking down of paradigms, it depends on the straddling of two or more cultures. By creating a new mythos- that is, a change in the way we perceive reality, the way we see ourselves and the ways we behave- la mestiza creates a consciousness."

         


*Metiza : a woman of racially mixed ancestry, especially, in Latin America, of mixed American Indian and European ancestry or, in the Philippines, of mixed native and foreign ancestry. 
http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/mestiza